Be There Always
by mandyrose2128
Summary: Dougie is struggling being in rehab and needs his best friend. Pudd


**AN: Sorry for any errors, wrote this in about an hour after reading Unsaid Things again and it inspired me to write this. Also, I have nothing against Izzy, she is totally adorable. This story in no way reflects my true thoughts of her.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own anything or anyone, just my own imagination.**

'People marching to the drums everybody's having fun to the sound of love'

I picked up my phone to see who was calling at 1 am and realized it was Dougie because that was my ring tone for him considering he wrote the song. I should also be getting used to him calling me at this hour considering where he was. He has been calling Tom and I both pretty much every night for the past week, crying because he was so depressed.

"What's going on Dougie? Are you okay?" I quietly climbed out of bed trying not to wake Izzy.

"Harry?" sniffled Dougie.

"Yea mate, what's wrong?" I asked softly as I walked downstairs to the living room.

"I…I don't…know…how much more I can handle." he managed to get out. I could tell he was trying to hold back tears. "I know I need to be in here, I need to get better but…I'm just so scared."

"I know you're scared Buttsy and we are all here for you. All Tom, Danny and I want is for you to get better. We love you, you know that right?" I asked, trying to comfort him.

He sobbed quietly and replied "I know…I just feel so alone right now. I don't even care about getting high or drunk right now. I'm just trying to stay afloat but I feel like I am drowning and can't breathe…I know trying to kill myself was a stupid thing to do but sometimes I feel like I want to jump out of this window. I really miss you guys."

"I know, we miss you too, just take deep breaths" I told him.

"I'm really trying but I just can't get a grip. I feel like I'm going crazy. That's why I called you, I needed to hear my best friends voice." He spoke quietly.

I could tell all this was pushing him towards another breaking point. He had already tried to take his own life. Thank God he hadn't been successful, I'd never be able to cope if I had lost him.

"You know you can call anytime, day or night. I will always be there for you." I promised him.

"I just really wish I could see you. If I have to wait another three weeks, I'll lose it. I need you guys with me."

It broke my heart to hear him like this, so lost and vulnerable. He's the youngest but he has always been pretty independent. He has always needed me, to certain extent. He needed me when he was younger when I taught him how to shave or Tom, who took him to open his first bank account, the basic stuff he needed us for. But it was usually me who needed him. I was usually the one who couldn't stay away from him or the other guys too long. We were each others air in a way. We were probably way too co-dependent of each other but that's what happens when you spend pretty much everyday together for 8 years straight.

"Okay Dougs, I'm going to call the center directly and get them to let me come see you tonight. I'll call you right back."

I hung up before he could say anything. If I could alleviate some of his pain by seeing him, I would do it. I called the center and somehow convinced them to let me come over if it meant helping calm him down. I called Dougie back and told him I'd be there in 20 minutes.

I rushed upstairs to get dressed and planned on leaving a note for Izzy.

"It's after 1 in the morning, where are you going?" came Izzy's sleepy voice.

"I have to go see Dougie, he's not having a good night." I replied.

"Oh…okay…but he's not going to get better if people keep coming to his rescue. He's getting the help he needs there. Can you even go there in the middle of the night?" she asked.

"Yea, I've already cleared it."

She sighed heavily and turned her back to me.

"Izzy, he is my best friend okay. He needs me and needs support. That's not rescuing him, that's being there for him. I don't understand why this is a problem all of a sudden. You know how much all of us guys mean to each other."

"Yea, I do. It just seems like you favor Dougie more….more than anything else." she said.

"I don't have time for this, I need to go." I told her.

She didn't say anything so I just finished putting my shoes on and ran downstairs, grabbed my keys and left. I drove as fast as I could while still trying to stay near the speed limits. I pulled into the parking lot 15 minutes later. I pushed the button next to the front door and waited for someone to come let me in. A man that was probably in his forties came to the door and opened it.

"You Harry?" He asked. I nodded and he stepped aside to let me enter.

"Follow me, I hope you have better luck then us tonight, he's not doing too good." He explained to me.

We arrived outside a door and the older man lightly knocked and turned the knob. He stepped aside and let me enter. I had barely taken a step when a body collided against mine and arms wrapped around me in a crushing hug. I quickly wrapped my arms around him and pressed my lips to the top of his head.

"Hey…Hey, it's okay," I said soothingly. "I'm here, you're going to be okay."

"I missed you so much. I'm sorry I woke you up. You didn't have to come." Dougie said taking deep breaths.

"Of course I did, you're my best friend. I always come when you need me," I answered while stroking his hair, "even when you don't need me I'd be there."

He chuckled at that and stepped back.

"Was Izzy upset?" he asked.

"I don't think so but even if she was, I don't care. She knows how important you are to me." I said smiling at him. He smiled softly back and offered me a seat. He sat down on the bed and I pulled up a chair right in front of him.

"I laid my hand on his knee and squeezed. He looked up at me and we both opened our mouths to speak at the same time.

"Go ahead." Dougie said.

"I was just going to ask how therapy is going." I told him.

"Honestly, it's hard. She is making me face a lot of things that I'd rather leave alone and telling me to open up and own up to some things I've been to afraid to do in the past." he answered truthfully.

"You don't have to tell me, that is confidential between you and her." I said.

"I want to tell you, just not yet, not while I'm in here."

"Okay, that's fine." I reassured him.

Dougie picked up my hand and held onto it.

"It really does mean a lot that you came. I don't know what I'd do without you…or the other guys." said Dougie.

"Hey…I'm always going to be here for you…always."

"I don't want you to jeopardize your relationship with Izzy because of me. I-."

"No, don't even say it. If she can't understand our friendship or is threatened by it, then maybe she is not the right one for me." I told Dougie.

"What? You guys are good together." Dougie said.

"We've been having some issues lately but you don't need to worry yourself about it. I just want you to focus on getting better and getting out of here." I told him.

He sighed deeply and laid down on his bed.

"Are you ready to go to bed? I can go if you want." I asked him

"NO…umm no, not yet," he said quickly. "Can you just stay and lay with me for a while? You know, the way we used too?"

"Yea, sure." I smiled at him.

He had a twin bed in his room and it would barely fit the both of us but personal space was never an issue with us.

I laid down next to him and he immediately snuggled into my chest. I chuckled lightly as I put an arm around him.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing, it's just that I remember when the roles were reversed and it was me who always needed you and snuggled into you." I said as I could feel my face turning a little red.

"Yea, I remember, before I started to change…You were always following me around," he snickered, " but I did need you then. We've always needed each other.

I turned my face to look at him and found him staring up at me. My breath caught in my throat as we both stared at each other. We've always been really close with each other but there was something different all of a sudden. I had never felt like this before towards him. It was as if we could read each others minds and knew what the other was thinking. We just stayed like that for a while, no words were needed. We slowly drifted off to sleep facing each other and arms wrapped around one another.

A slight knock came on the door some time later and I realized it was morning. I looked down at Dougie sleeping and smiled, he looked so peaceful. The orderly opened the door and peaked in. I put a finger to my lips to signal for him to be quiet. I slowly slipped out of the bed and walked out to the hallway.

"How's he doing?" he asked.

"I think he's okay right now. I'm going to go say goodbye to him and head home." I told the orderly.

"Yea, that'd be best. He has a full day ahead of him."

I walked back into the room and laid down next to Dougie and pulled him into a hug. He began to stir and opened his eyes.

"Good morning." I said.

"Good morning." he smiled at me.

"How did you sleep?" I asked.

"Honestly, I think that's the best I've slept in months."

"I'm glad." I smiled looking down at him.

"I hate to leave but the orderly already came by and said I should get going."

I could see his face drop a little but he tried to cover it up.

"Don't worry, I'm going to come see you every chance I get and the next 3 weeks are going to go by really fast." I said.

"I know, I'll be okay but don't be surprised if you still get calls from in the middle of the night."

"I told you, day or night, doesn't matter."

We both stood up and I took him in my arms. We stood there embracing each other for a few minutes before pulling away, He had some tears in his eyes but I could tell after one night, he was getting stronger. I leaned in and pecked him on his cheek and said goodbye.

"See ya later mate." said Dougie.

I winked at him and walked out.

The next three weeks went by slowly. I and the other guys went and saw him periodically but we were also busy gearing up for the tour that started a few days after Dougie got out. He still called me and we'd talk for hours at night. Izzy became fed up with the whole situation and we finally sat down to talk and decided to go our separate ways. We had a long talk, some of it was hard and some of it was her trying to encourage me to admit to some things I hadn't even realized myself. I think we were going to make better friends than we did lovers.

Today is the day! I am so excited and thankful. Dougie is coming home to us. Even though we got to see him and talk to him, this was still the longest we, as a group, had ever been separated since we met.

Tom was picking him up and we were all meeting back at Tom's place and having a group night, just us guys. Gi was going to her sisters for the night to give us all sometime to hang out and just be boys for the evening.

I could see the car pull up and yelled to Danny in the kitchen that they were here. We both rushed to the front door and swung it open just as they were walking up. Danny rushed forward and grabbed Dougie in a bear hug, lifting him off the ground,

"BUTTSY," yelled Danny, "so glad you're back."

"Me too," Dougie managed to say, "but you're cutting off my air supply."

"Oh, sorry." Said Danny and released Dougie.

I walked up to him and wrapped my arms around him as he buried his face in my neck.

"Missed you" he said.

"Missed you too." I smiled.

We pulled away and I grabbed his bags for him. He was staying at Tom's for a while. He and the rest of us thought it would be a good idea for him to stay with one of us for a little bit and Tom wouldn't take no for answer and insisted Dougie stay with him.

"Hey, I was thinking we could order in and play some Xbox or watch some movies, sound good?" asked Tom.

"Sounds great" answered Dougie.

"I'm just going to help him put his stuff upstairs in the spare bedroom." I told Tom.

Dougie and I walked upstairs to the third floor and into what was Dougie's room for now. I set the bags on the chest at the foot of the bed and sat down while Dougie started unpacking. He was putting things away as we made small talk and just relished in the fact that we were all whole again. We knew there would be obstacles and struggles along the way but we were on the right track for Dougie's recovery.

I stood up to help him and our hands brushed against each other and we both stopped and stared.

"I wanted to tell you something." Dougie started.

"Wait, me first," I interrupted, "Izzy and I broke up and she moved out."

His eyes widened but I quickly explained that it was okay and that it was mutual and we'll still be friends.

"But she brought to light something that I didn't really understand…I mean I knew but I didn't really know, you know? Uhh, I'm not explaining myself very well." I said getting frustrated with myself.

"It's okay, My therapist was doing the same thing. Brought things to light that were always there but never realized or acknowledged." explained Dougie.

"What I'm trying to say is…Oh hell!" I said.

I got fed up with my words and just grabbed his face and pulled it to mine. I threw out all worries and all inhibitions and smashed our lips together. I think he was shocked at first but began responding to me and moving his lips with mine. I ran my tongue across his bottom lip, seeking entrance. He parted his lips and I dove my tongue into his mouth seeking dominance, claiming him for myself. I started to slow down still rubbing my tongue against his. It wasn't so heated anymore, it became sweet and gentle. I had never tasted anything so amazing.

We both pulled away slowly, needing air. I gazed down at him and saw that he still had his eyes closed and lips slightly parted. I leaned in and gave him another peck.

He opened his eyes and looked at me before saying,

"Yea, that's what I was trying to say too."


End file.
